Cook To Bang – Recipes To Get You Laid

It was a dark and stormy night. There was a knock on my door. I opened the door only to find a slutty vampire ready to suck me dry.

The time is upon us!  My favorite holiday has arrived and I am ready to indulge in all manner of costumed tomfoolery.  You have to love a holiday that is an excuse for girls to bring out their inner sluts.  And sluts are given a pass for being the whores they are.  Dudes can act like maniacs and blame the “character” they are playing.  This year I am dressing like a doctor with a cardboard box labeled: FREE MAMMOGRAMS.  Someone needs to get the word out about Breast Cancer Awareness and if that means fondling hot strangers frittatas, I accept.  Yet I digress from my main point which is encourage my readers to be reckless, drink heavily and sleep with someone dressed like a slutty nurse, hunky fireman or the 10 million lemmings dressed like Michael Jackson.  Halloween is a perfect time to recruit new dates to COOK TO BANG.  Serve this awesomely boozy and rather tasty orange punch and you’ll be well on your way.  When in doubt, blame the booze.  Boo!

Total time: approximately 5 minutes
Projected cost: $20
Eating Buddy: Something scary, freaky or stable so you can soak up the booze you’re slurping

Ingredients (serves a party of hotties):
1. 46 oz pineapple juice
2. 750 ml dark rum
3. 2 liters ginger ale
4. 3 packets of orange Kool-Aid powder
5. Ice
6. Black licorice for straws

Step 1
Mix together the ice, dark rum, pineapple juice, ginger ale and Kool-Aid.

Cut the ends off the black licorice to create straws you can suck the punch through.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 30th, 2015 at 9:30 am and is filed under holidays, libation lubrication, RECIPES. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.