Cook To Bang – Recipes To Get You Laid

Forget the little blue pill. Try the big green melon!

Are you feeling weak-willed, pathetic and flaccid?  You no longer have an excuse with this outstanding summer soup recipe.  Studies have proven that the citrulline in WATERMELON triggers arginine, the chemical in Viagra that gets male pistons pumping.  This soup will turbo charge your libido so you can take plenty of prisoners in the bedroom who won’t want to be released.  Stockholm Syndrome will be in effect with the amount of good loving you will be dishing out in a soup bowl.  Did I mention how refreshing chilled watermelon soup tastes, especially when you go for seconds after a particularly exhausting banging session?  Now get yourself to the market and then blow your dates mind, body and soul.  Boom-chicka-wah-wah!

Total time: approximately 3½ hours

Projected cost: $13

Drinking Buddy: It’s liquid, but you could throw some vodka into it for extra-sexy time adventures

Ingredients (enough for plenty of leftovers):

1. 2 cups of white wine

2. 1 liter of club soda

3. ½ cup of sugar

4. 1 large seedless WATERMELON

6. 1 small handful of chopped GINGER

7. 2 handfuls of chopped mint leaves

8. 1 tablespoon of butter (use margarine to make vegan)

Step 1

Melt the butter in a large stockpot on medium heat.  Saute the ginger, sugar, ½ the lime juice and mint leaves.

Step 2

Split the watermelon in half and cut and/or scoop out the melon meat into the stockpot.  Puree the watermelon, and then add the white wine and sugar.  Bring it all to a boil and then lower the heat and simmer until you cook the alcohol out (approx 10 min).  Let it chill in the fridge (approx 3 hrs).

Step 3

Ladle in the soup into a deep bowl or the watermelon halves (extra classy touch).  Add the club soda and the remaining mint leaves and limejuice.  Serve it chilled in bowls, crowning it with crumbled goat cheese if you feel bold.