Well, hello there! Haven’t seen you around. I would have noticed someone as fine as you. What inspired you to come to my little part of the world? No shit! You came to see me? You want me to cook to bang you? Fair enough. It’s just that I’m usually the one pursuing dates. Nothing wrong with someone aggressive that knows what they want. If it’s me you want, so be it. Wait, you’re vegan? Why? Never mind. It won’t be a problem. So how about some Portobello mushroom tacos? Glad you enjoyed them. Shall we retire to the bedroom now? Thanks for stopping by.
Total time: approximately 25 minutes
Projected cost: $6
Drinking Buddy: Beer or BANGARITA
Ingredients (serves 2):
1. 1 tbsp tomato paste
2. SALSA to taste
3. ½ tbsp vegetable oil
4. ½ onion
5. 1 Portobello mushroom
6. 1 small handful of cilantro
7. 4 small tortillas
8. ½ AVOCADO sliced thinly
9. 1 CHILI PEPPER
10. 1 handful of shredded lettuce
11. 1 tomato chopped coarsely
Chop the onion and chili pepper coarsely and combine them with the cilantro and tomato paste and puree it all.
Cut the Portobello mushroom in long thin strips, marinate them with the puree (approx 15 min), and then stir-fry them with the vegetable oil (approx 5 min).
Wrap up the tortillas with foil and heat them up in the oven (approx 5 min). Fill each tortilla with the Portobello stir-fry, lettuce, tomato and avocado. Serve them up with SIMPLY SEXY SALSA.