X marks the G-spot

Arrr! Ahoy, maties! I spot a hard body off the starboard bow! Land ho (or was that hos?)! We shall not rest until we collect all the doubloons in their pantaloons. Plunder everything you can before we make off into the night. We shall woo them with our finest spices traded from the far East. The healthier, shinier, and tastier the treasure, the better! If you don’t like your captain’s skullduggery, walk the plank!

Total time: Approximately 20 minutes
Projected cost: $9
Drinking buddy: White wine or sake

Ingredients (serves 2)
1. 1 dash crushed red PEPPER
2. 1 tbsp rice vinegar
3. 1 dash salt
4. 1 dash black pepper
5. 1 cucumber
6. 2 green onions
7. 1 handful cilantro leaves

Step 1
Peel the cucumber and cut away the stems. quarter the cucumber, cut away the seeds, and chop into bite-sized pieces. Chop the green onions and cilantro leaves finely.

Step 2
Mix together cucumber, green onions, cilantro, salt, black pepper, crushed red pepper, and rice vinegar. Serve immediately.

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