Western | Cook To Bang - Recipes To Get You Laid

Cook To Bang – Recipes To Get You Laid

recipes sex seduction food homemade ctb cheap fast diy naked bang easy gourmet kitchen delicious yummy intercourse cunnilingus seduce grilling bbq soup main course entree atkins carbs salad appetizers fingerfood libations sandwich dessert sweets nude offensive hilarious funny casanova horny lunch dinner breakfast snacks alternative valentines boil bake poach stir-fry booze day morning wood drinks alcohol beverages nudity party entertaining australian heart low-fat low-caloriespanish southern northern latin american french italian mediterranean diet christmas pie mexican thai chinese international easter brownie picnic holidays thanksgiving cocktail pasta chicken fish bedroom history ancient civilizations cookie veggie fruit chocolate cheese steamed curry salsa tacos healthy vegan vegetarian fries rice noodles recession aphrodisiac

REVERSE COWGIRL EGGS

March 7, 2016

Ride these eggs Reverse Cowgirl style, YIPPY KI YI YAY!

Howdy, pardners! You look hungry after wrestling all morning with them coyote uglies. I reckon you could do with a little breakfast before you herd them little doggies into that there pen. Pull yerself up round that campfire, eat my sexy version of cowboy eggs and I’ll tell some tall tales about them crazy cowgirls in Dodge City. These girls will holler at the moon and love nothing more than to be ridden hard and put away wet. I reckon y’all know what I mean so you best get on that Pony Express and get yerself a piece before Wild Bill and his men cock-block you. This here recipe came about when I had my own cowgirl who wanted something quick before dragging me back up to the saloon bedroom for more of the same. We done did hide out all morning, afternoon and night and that sheriff never got his mangy paws on me. Thanks to her, I lived to tell this story and feed you my wake-me-up special. Yee-haw!

Total time: approximately 4 minutes
Projected cost: $2
Drinking Buddy: These are usually morning meal, so OJ or mimosas will do.

Ingredients (per dish):
1. 2 eggs
2. 2 thick slices of bread (recommend Texas Toast)
3. salt to taste
4. ½ an avocado
5. black pepper to taste
6. 1 teaspoon of butter

Step 1
Use a large bottle cap (like for juice) and put a hole into the middle of each slice of bread. Melt the butter in a pan on medium heat and then throw in the bread.

Step 2
Crack an egg into the center of each hole. Sprinkle the desired amount of salt and pepper on each egg (approx 2 minutes). Once the egg whites start to escape and harden from under the bread, flip them and cook the other side making sue the yolk is still soft in the middle (approx 1-2 minutes). Serve it up on a plate with the side you cooked first up, its much prettier, and crown with avocado slices. Serve with bacon or hot sauce if you like.

Leave a Comment » | MORNING WOOD, RECIPES | Tagged: American, avocado, bang, bread, breakfast, butter, camping, Country, Cowboy eggs, delicious, easy, eggs, game changer, get laid, gourmet, guarantee, hole, hole in bread, intercourse, kitchen, morning, naked, romance, SEDUCTION, sex, simple, tasty, toast, Western | Permalink
Posted by cooktobang

WHY ASK WHY? FRY BREAKFAST

January 4, 2010

Why is not as important as when.

Quit with the questions already! I experiment with recipes sometimes to discover new and exciting methods to prepare banging food. Oftentimes I crash and burn with my noble attempts at cooking something groundbreaking. You have to stumble before you can walk; kiss before you bang. But there are times where I rock the living crap out of the ingredients I’m working for and then…BAM! It’s like being the first man to discover the clitoris. You always assumed there was something there, but it took some serious creative spelunking to get there. So that is what I offer you now. This is a little ditty made out of boredom for the standard breakfast fare. I knew there was some clever way to take the best parts of Middle Eastern and Western to create a fusion that all us infidels can enjoy. My date agreed after getting over her skepticism of the unfamiliar. She did not ask why I led her immediately back to bed after we were done eating. My perverted intent was implied.

Total time: approximately 10 minutes
Projected cost: $5
Drinking Buddy: MIMOSUCK IT

Ingredients (Serves 2):
1. 2 tbsp vegetable oil
2. 3 dashes sea salt
3. 4 tomato slices
4. 1/2 onion sliced in strips
5. 2 eggs
6. 1/2 AVOCADO sliced thinly
7. 1 small handful queso fresco (Mexican cheese)
8. 1/2 large pita (one pictured infused with thyme)

Step 1
Heat up the oil in a skillet. Throw in the onions and fry until they caramelize (approx 3 min). Fry up the tomatoes next, salting them and flipping once (approx 2 min). Finally make room in pan to fry up pita.

Step 2
Scoop the fried onions and tomato onto the pita. Crack the eggs in the space now available, salt them, and fry sunny side up (approx 3 min). Split the eggs in two and serve over each half of the pita. Surround the egg yolk with avocado like a halo and crumble some queso fresco on top.

Split the pita in two and serve them up on separate plates with BED & BREAKFAST POTATOES.