APHRODISIAC BOOTY BOMB SCRAMBLE

September 16, 2015
KA-BOOM!  This dish will shake the room.

KA-BOOM! This dish will shake the room.

KA-BOOM!  Don’t worry your pretty little head.  It’s not North Korea or Russia dropping bombs.  This bomb is going off in your mouth and then in your pants. The APHRODISIAC quantities have been quadrupled to ensure you get your based needs met. It’s sort of like napalming an entire jungle to take out one sniper.  Overkill?  Perhaps.  But the job gets done and you get off.  This overzealous approach happens to offer banging flavor blasts that should keep you popping, locking and dropping trow.  Finally you have a reason to get up out of bed where you have someone slumbering peaceful and naked.  Wake them up with a mouthful of eggs and a crotch full of you.  KA-BLOOEY! Read the rest of this entry »


ORAL TATER-SPLOSIONS

February 16, 2015
oral tatersplosions served

This recipe will self-destruct in 10 seconds…after you bang like a champ!

These potatoes are not unlike Inspector Gadget’s self-destructing mission assignments.  But instead of them blowing up and you get saliva across your face instead of soot.  These bad boys pack a walloping 1-2-3 punch of tasty, decadent flavor.  They are not for the pantywaists concerned about too much flavor overwhelming the subtlety of the evening.  Not on my watch!  Like Inspector Gadget, and really his dog Brain who did everything, I am working with a shadowy government organization seeking to rid the world of flavor.  That is where these potatoes come in.  It’s our secret weapon against those who would remove any remnants of toe-curling pleasure you could eke out of dining.  If we let them win now, who’s to say what they could next. Soon enough they’ll be taking away our love of banging! Glenn Beck should be all up in their tits.  Who’s the real American hero now, crybaby? Read the rest of this entry »