September 21, 2015
Shrimping and pimping and bed sheet crimping
It’s time to apply the philosophy of MTV’s Pimp My Ride to your dinner. Say you have a taco recipe that is so-so. Your tacos will feed hungry people, but chances are no one you’ve served them to have torn off their clothes to show their appreciation. That is a damn shame Cook To Bang will rectify. We’re taking a simple taco recipe, supping it up with aphrodisiac-laden flavor, and letting that shit ride across your plates then down your gullets faster than you can say, “I’ll get some protection.” I learned a similar recipe while acting a fool in Baja California chasing senoritas while downing margaritas. These tacos sure made my beach side dalliances more enjoyable. I smuggled the recipe across the border along with some fireworks and KABOOM! Pleasant pimpin’. Read the rest of this entry »
2 Comments | aphrodisiac, APHRODISIACS ANONYMOUS, fusion, healthy, IT’S ON!-TREES, mexican, RECIPES, seafood | Tagged: aphrodisiac, avocado, Baja California, bang, banging, bbq, beachside, black pepper, cabbage, corn tortillas, cumin, delicious, DIY, easy, fireworks, food, fusion, game changer, garlic, get laid, gourmet, grill, guarantee, healthy, homemade, honey, intercourse, kaboom, kitchen, libido, margarita, mexican, mexico, mtv, naked, oregano, pimp my ride, pimp my shrimp taco recipe, protection, recipe, salsa, salt, seafood, seduce, SEDUCTION, senoritas, sex, shrimp, shrimp taco recipe, smuggle, taco, tasty, yummy | Permalink
Posted by cooktobang
July 20, 2015
Celebrate Cinco de Mayo with cinco sessions de bango!
The time has come my friends to celebrate the Mexican army’s triumph over France in 1852! Those of you who think today is Mexican Independence Day need to drop the Corona and sober up. You see, nothing says raw sex appeal like Mexican military history. No doubt we will all focus on the strategic importance of this victory rather than get piss drunk on tequila and stuff our mouths with all manner of FINGER FOODS. But if you must indulge in the tomfoolery of celebrating Mexican culture, drink with style. The sexy senoritas and senors will respond more favorably to a beverage of this caliber than to a margarita made from that acidic pre-mix and bad tequila. Now make like a Mexican jumping bean and dance around that sombrero. Ole! Read the rest of this entry »
1 Comment | fusion, libation lubrication, mexican, RECIPES | Tagged: 1852, alcohol, alcoholic, bang, Bangarita, beer, beverage, booze, boozy, cinco de mayo, corona, delicious, DIY, drink, drunk, easy, foo, France, game changer, get laid, gourmet, guarantee, history, homemade, ice, intercourse, kitchen, libation librication, lime, liquor, mango margarita recipe, mango nectar, mangorita recipe, margarita, mexican, Mexican independence day, mexico, military, mint leaves, naked, raw cane sugar, recipe, sauced, seduce, senoritas, senors, sex, sex appeal, silver tequila, tasty, triple sec, vodka, yummy | Permalink
Posted by cooktobang
April 17, 2009
Sex you can, yes you can!
Buenas noches, senoritas! There is plenty of room at mi casa y mi cama for a little bit of this and a whole lot of that. Considering how simple, fast and cheap these pizzas are to create, we can make them all night long. So feel free to invite some of your sexy amigas along. I’m selfless enough to share myself with all of you. It’s what Jesus would have done. And isn’t that what it’s all about? Screaming “Oh God!” or “Dios mio!” into the night demonstrates family values. So let’s do our part. Together we can make this world a more pleasurable place.
Total time: approximately 15 minutes
Projected cost: $5
Drinking Buddy: Beer or tequila
Ingredients (serves 2):
1. 2 medium-sized flour tortillas
2. ½ can of black beans
3. 1 jalapeño de-seeded chopped
4. 1 tomato chopped coarsely
5. 2 handfuls of shredded jack cheese
6. ½ an AVOCADO sliced thinly
7. 2 sprinkles of Menudo mix
Preheat an oven or toaster oven to 375 degrees F. Use a fork to spread out a ¼ can of black beans on each tortilla, using as little of the bean liquid as possible. Scatter the jalapeño and tomato evenly over the beans. Place the cheese evenly above and crown it with a sprinkle of menudo mix.
Throw the Mexican pizzas in the oven and bake until the cheese melts and the tortillas brown and harden (approx 12 minutes). Remove from the oven and artfully place the avocado slices over the pizzas and chop into quarters and serve. Ole!
Leave a Comment » | aphrodisiac, APHRODISIACS ANONYMOUS, FINGER FOOD FOREPLAY, fusion, italian, mexican, RECIPES, vegetarian | Tagged: aphrodisiac, bake, bang, black beans, Buenos noches, cheap, Christian, dairy, delicious, dios mio, DIY, easy, family values, fast, game changer, get laid, gourmet, guarantee, homemade, intercourse, jack cheese, jalapeño tomato, jesus, kitchen, menudo mix, mexican, Mexican pizza recipe, mexico, naked, recipe, seduce, senoritas, sex, sex you can, tasty, tortilla crust, tortilla recipe, yummy | Permalink
Posted by cooktobang