March 18, 2016

Layer upon layer of resistance-slayers.
This recipe goes out to all the March madness maniacs. According to my research, a girl from I was banging, 7 Layer Dip is the ultimate sports-viewing treat. Forgive me if I was misinformed. Rather than curse my inaccuracies with mob justice your time would be better served recreating this dish and serve it up to your football-viewing posse. People who like variety are well sorted with this All-American concoction. The 7 Layer Dip is sort of like a chameleon lover who will become whatever you want them to be. Whether you want white, black, Latin, Asian, or a magical mix, you will get your fill. Talk about a menagerie of flavor! Make this dip, bring it to the party, and go home with some impressed hottie for the win!
Total time: approximately 10 minutes
Projected cost: $12
Drinking Buddy: Beer, beer, and more beer!
Ingredients (Serves a whole party):
1. 1 bag tortilla chips
2. 1 can refried bean
3. 1 small container sour cream
4. SIMPLY SEXY SALSA
5. GUAPO GRINGO GUACAMOLE
6. 2 handfuls jack cheese
7. 2 tomatoes chopped coarsely
8. 3 green onions chopped coarsely
9. 1 handful black olives diced
Step 1
Warm up the refried beans on medium-low heat, mixing in the tomatoes (approx 5 min). Evenly pour the beans into your serving bowl.

Step 2
Pour in the contents of these evenly in this order: salsa, green onions, half the jack cheese, sour cream, guacamole, olives, and the remaining cheese.

Place the chips artfully around the edge of the dip right before serving. Hear those cheers? They aren’t for the latest sack. It’s for your sexy ass!


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Posted by cooktobang
November 9, 2015

Love me tender, Love me baked, They'll never tell you no!
So it’s game day. Are you ready for some football? Damn straight! Do you have your jersey? Check! Beer helmet? Mos def! The case of brewskies? You know it? The appetizer your friend asked you to bring for their Super Bowl party? Wait, what? You do know that the game starts in an hour, right? Oh, &$%#! Before you go postal on us, just know COOK TO BANG has a solution for you. This dish is simple enough for a syphilitic monkey to do and a guaranteed football crowd pleaser. You will inspire greatness in everyone attending who will then sing your praises, followed by a chorus of Queen’s “We Are The Champions.” Now that you have your theme song backing you up, turn your attention to that single hottie across the room. Walk right over, sit down next to them, and offer baked piece of heaven. Way to go, champ! Read the rest of this entry »
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FINGER FOOD FOREPLAY, RECIPES, sports, Super bowl, winter | Tagged: baked, baked chicken tenders, bang, bread crumbs, breaded, breading, Cajun seasoning, chicken breasts, chicken nuggets recipe, Chicken tenders recipe, delicious, easy, finger food, FINGER FOOD FOREPLAY, football, game, game changer, game day, get laid, gourmet, guarantee, healthier, healthy, honey, intercourse, kitchen, lemon, mayonnaise, naked, nfl, not fried, nugget, parmesan, party, recipe, romance, SEDUCTION, sex, snack, sports, Super bowl, tailgate, tailgating, tasty, tender, white meat, winter, yummy |
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Posted by cooktobang
September 25, 2015

Blue 42, blue 42, hut hut bang!
Welcome to Part II of the 2010 CTB Super Bowl recipe throw down. For the uninitiated or those lacking cognitive reasoning, jambalaya is a dish native to Louisiana, New Orleans in particular. Therefore this dish is dedicated to the New Orleans Saints. My life is too consumed with cooking and banging to pay much attention to football stats. The Saints or the Colts could triumph and it wouldn’t make any difference so long as I have someone warm and cuddly in my bed that night. But in terms of the Food Bowl, New Orleans crushes Indianapolis hands down. The cuisine down South is like a wet dream jumping right off my plate and down my pantaloons. It might be the French influence, it might be the innovations of American ancestors, it might be that I am totally gay for spicy food. I wager all three. But you will turn a few heads with this dish that feeds the hungry, unwashed masses. So whomever you’re cheering for, you will leave a winner with phone numbers and possibly a football-loving hottie on your arm. Read the rest of this entry »
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Cajun, carboluscious, CARBS WORKIN’ THE CORNER, poultry, RECIPES, southern, spicy, sports, Super bowl | Tagged: ancestors, andouille sausage, bang, banging, bell peppers, black pepper, Cajun, Cajun seasoning, chicken, chicken stock, creole, cuisine, delicious, dip, DIY, easy, food, football, game changer, garlic, get laid, gourmet, guarantee, homemade, Indianapolis colts, intercourse, jamabalaya recipe, kitchen, lemon, libido, Louisiana, naked, New Orleans, new Orleans saints, nfl, olive oil, onion, pantaloons, recipe, salt, seduce, SEDUCTION, sex, slow cook, south, southern, spicy, Super bowl, tasty, tomato paste, tomatoes, unwashed masses, white rice, yummy |
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Posted by cooktobang