April 4, 2016
Lead your enchanted hordes with the glorious tune of your Potato Skin Flute.
The flute is an enchanting instrument that when played right can control the minds of the captivated audience. Pan rocked his pipes and outplayed Mt. Olympus’s residents. The Pied Piper inspired people to follow him like sheep, dancing like fools through meadows and forests. Even Saint Patrick the heartthrob priest used a wind instrument to drive the snakes out of Ireland. You too can enjoy such greatness if you embrace and master your own flute (or your man’s). Play that flute beautifully with precision and attention to detail and they will follow you anywhere you want to go. Just imagine the possibilities once you have someone under your flute’s spell and yearning for your next note. Audiences can be fickle so keep them fed so the flute party keeps going. Savory Potato Skin Flutes will do the trick. Cheeky, cheap and cheesy! You’ll be back playing the final crescendo in no time. ♪
Total time: approximately 20 minutes
Projected cost: $4
Drinking Buddy: Beer or a MO MOJO MOJITO
Ingredients (for two):
1. 2 tablespoons of olive oil
2. ½ teaspoon of salt
3. ½ teaspoon of pepper
4. 1 teaspoon of paprika
5. Sour cream for dipping
6. ½ cup of shredded jack (or cheddar) cheese
7. 1/3 cup of shredded Parmesan
8. 1 JALAPEÑO chopped into thin round slices
9. 3 potatoes
10. 2 coarsely chopped green onions (optional, not pictured)
Preheat the oven to 475 degrees F. Create the potato skin glaze by mixing the olive oil, paprika, salt, pepper, and Parmesan in a bowl.
Wash the potatoes thoroughly, and then cut them in half and scoop out the centers with a spoon, leaving the skins in tact. Place the 6 potato skins in a greased baking pan, apply the glaze evenly over all and toss them in the oven to bake (approx 7 minutes). Pull the pan out of the oven and flip the skins over and bake until they brown (approx 7 minutes). Flip the skins back over and throw in the jalapeños (and green onions if you wish) and cover them with cheese. Toss the skins back in the oven until the cheese melts (approx 2 minutes). Serve those bad boys up on a plate with sour cream and if you are feeling bold, GUAPO GRINGO GUACAMOLE.
Leave a Comment » | APHRODISIACS ANONYMOUS, carboluscious, CARBS WORKIN’ THE CORNER, FINGER FOOD FOREPLAY, RECIPES, spicy, sports, Super bowl, vegetarian | Tagged: appetizer, baked potato, bang, bar food, baseball, basketball, cheddar cheese, delicious, DIY, drunken, easy, fattening, finger food, football, game, game changer, get laid, gourmet, green onions, guarantee, homemade, intercourse, jack cheese, jalapeño, kitchen, naked, olive oil, paprika, parmesan, pepper, Potato skins recipe, potatoes, recipe, salt, sex, simple, sour cream, sports, sports bar, Super bowl, tailgate, tailgating, tapas, tasty, yummy | Permalink
Posted by cooktobang
March 18, 2016
Layer upon layer of resistance-slayers.
This recipe goes out to all the March madness maniacs. According to my research, a girl from I was banging, 7 Layer Dip is the ultimate sports-viewing treat. Forgive me if I was misinformed. Rather than curse my inaccuracies with mob justice your time would be better served recreating this dish and serve it up to your football-viewing posse. People who like variety are well sorted with this All-American concoction. The 7 Layer Dip is sort of like a chameleon lover who will become whatever you want them to be. Whether you want white, black, Latin, Asian, or a magical mix, you will get your fill. Talk about a menagerie of flavor! Make this dip, bring it to the party, and go home with some impressed hottie for the win!
Total time: approximately 10 minutes
Projected cost: $12
Drinking Buddy: Beer, beer, and more beer!
Ingredients (Serves a whole party):
1. 1 bag tortilla chips
2. 1 can refried bean
3. 1 small container sour cream
4. SIMPLY SEXY SALSA
5. GUAPO GRINGO GUACAMOLE
6. 2 handfuls jack cheese
7. 2 tomatoes chopped coarsely
8. 3 green onions chopped coarsely
9. 1 handful black olives diced
Warm up the refried beans on medium-low heat, mixing in the tomatoes (approx 5 min). Evenly pour the beans into your serving bowl.
Pour in the contents of these evenly in this order: salsa, green onions, half the jack cheese, sour cream, guacamole, olives, and the remaining cheese.
Place the chips artfully around the edge of the dip right before serving. Hear those cheers? They aren’t for the latest sack. It’s for your sexy ass!
Leave a Comment » | FINGER FOOD FOREPLAY, mexican, RECIPES, sports, Super bowl, vegetarian | Tagged: 7 layer dip recipe, 7 layers of awesome dip, all-american, bang, banging, black olives, chameleon, college basketball, colts, delicious, dip, DIY, easy, food, football, game changer, get laid, gourmet, green onions, guacamole, guarantee, homemade, Indiana, Indianapolis, intercourse, jack cheese, jocks, kitchen, libido, march madness, menagerie, naked, nfl, recipe, refried beans, salsa, seduce, SEDUCTION, sex, sour cream, sports, superbowl, superbowl recipes, tasty, tomatoes, tortilla chips, touchdown, usa, vegetarian, yummy | Permalink
Posted by cooktobang
November 9, 2015
Love me tender, Love me baked, They'll never tell you no!
So it’s game day. Are you ready for some football? Damn straight! Do you have your jersey? Check! Beer helmet? Mos def! The case of brewskies? You know it? The appetizer your friend asked you to bring for their Super Bowl party? Wait, what? You do know that the game starts in an hour, right? Oh, &$%#! Before you go postal on us, just know COOK TO BANG has a solution for you. This dish is simple enough for a syphilitic monkey to do and a guaranteed football crowd pleaser. You will inspire greatness in everyone attending who will then sing your praises, followed by a chorus of Queen’s “We Are The Champions.” Now that you have your theme song backing you up, turn your attention to that single hottie across the room. Walk right over, sit down next to them, and offer baked piece of heaven. Way to go, champ! Read the rest of this entry »
Leave a Comment » | FINGER FOOD FOREPLAY, RECIPES, sports, Super bowl, winter | Tagged: baked, baked chicken tenders, bang, bread crumbs, breaded, breading, Cajun seasoning, chicken breasts, chicken nuggets recipe, Chicken tenders recipe, delicious, easy, finger food, FINGER FOOD FOREPLAY, football, game, game changer, game day, get laid, gourmet, guarantee, healthier, healthy, honey, intercourse, kitchen, lemon, mayonnaise, naked, nfl, not fried, nugget, parmesan, party, recipe, romance, SEDUCTION, sex, snack, sports, Super bowl, tailgate, tailgating, tasty, tender, white meat, winter, yummy | Permalink
Posted by cooktobang
September 25, 2015
Blue 42, blue 42, hut hut bang!
Welcome to Part II of the 2010 CTB Super Bowl recipe throw down. For the uninitiated or those lacking cognitive reasoning, jambalaya is a dish native to Louisiana, New Orleans in particular. Therefore this dish is dedicated to the New Orleans Saints. My life is too consumed with cooking and banging to pay much attention to football stats. The Saints or the Colts could triumph and it wouldn’t make any difference so long as I have someone warm and cuddly in my bed that night. But in terms of the Food Bowl, New Orleans crushes Indianapolis hands down. The cuisine down South is like a wet dream jumping right off my plate and down my pantaloons. It might be the French influence, it might be the innovations of American ancestors, it might be that I am totally gay for spicy food. I wager all three. But you will turn a few heads with this dish that feeds the hungry, unwashed masses. So whomever you’re cheering for, you will leave a winner with phone numbers and possibly a football-loving hottie on your arm. Read the rest of this entry »
1 Comment | Cajun, carboluscious, CARBS WORKIN’ THE CORNER, poultry, RECIPES, southern, spicy, sports, Super bowl | Tagged: ancestors, andouille sausage, bang, banging, bell peppers, black pepper, Cajun, Cajun seasoning, chicken, chicken stock, creole, cuisine, delicious, dip, DIY, easy, food, football, game changer, garlic, get laid, gourmet, guarantee, homemade, Indianapolis colts, intercourse, jamabalaya recipe, kitchen, lemon, libido, Louisiana, naked, New Orleans, new Orleans saints, nfl, olive oil, onion, pantaloons, recipe, salt, seduce, SEDUCTION, sex, slow cook, south, southern, spicy, Super bowl, tasty, tomato paste, tomatoes, unwashed masses, white rice, yummy | Permalink
Posted by cooktobang