February 3, 2016
Bust a nut with some butternut

Bust a nut with some butternut

“I think I’m gonna bust a nut all over this squash! Can’t hold back any more.  Oh yeah, here it comes. Mmm mmm.  Damn this soup hits the spot every time.”  This is the typical reaction you get when you make this during wintertime.  The butternut is the sexiest, tastiest, most sultry member of the squash family.  It absorbs flavor like a champ and becomes velvety when cooked right. And when you roast it, good god does it drip with sex appeal.  There aren’t adjectives provocative enough to sum up cooking roasted butternut squash into a soup so I’ll leave that filthy fantasy to the individual chef.  This soup has gotten me through the leanest of times with some lovelies with countless requests for sequels.  One ex tried to get this recipe before we broke up, but I refused so she left in a huff never to be seen again.  Roxanne*, if you’re reading this, here’s the recipe finally available to any and all.  Enjoy, and give your cat my best. Read the rest of this entry »


January 22, 2016
Ass-ential aphrodisiac for the lustfully-challenged.

Ass-ential aphrodisiac for the lustfully-challenged.

Soup’s sex appeal is often underestimated because it’s generally associated with cans of Campbell’s.  Yes it’s functional and generally quite good for you, but ingredients make the difference.  Enter asparagus, an aphrodisiac and natural Viagra.  17th Century UK naturalist Nicholas Culpepper said asparagus could “stir up lust in man and woman.”  The magical vegetable is loaded with potassium and Vitamin A that boost sex drives and the folic acid produces histamines that increase the power of an orgasm.  So if history, health and sex aren’t motivating factors, consider that it tastes bloody amazing.  Throw in some seafood and you are ready to rock ‘til the break of dawn.  I made this dish the other night for a lady I’m fond of and neither of us was left with blue balls, culinary or otherwise.  Round 1 was shortly followed by Round 2, 3 and on and on. Read the rest of this entry »


August 4, 2009
Squish squash, let's get sauced!

Squish squash, let's get sauced!

This side dish is soft to the touch, yet crunchy in all the right places.  As described, this does not sound like the hard-body of summer vegetable concoctions.  But this dish could help you get that hard beach body all the cool kids seem to be having these days.  This casserole is light, full of flavor and pack a wallop of flavor-filled fungasms.  This particular dish was an experiment in how to cook summer squash besides on the grill.  A tough act to follow.  It provided great company for the grilled chicken I served to this annoying date.  The date was a bust, but luckily I got my jollies from this casserole.  The silver lining never tasted so good.

squash casserole prepTotal time: approximately 55 minutes
Projected cost: $8
Drinking Buddy: Nice cold beer or white wine

1. 1 tbsp breadcrumbs
2. 2 tbsp olive oil
3. 1 dash paprika
4. 1 dash salt
5. 1 onion chopped coarsely
6. 2 green onions chopped coarsely
7. 4 globe squash
8. 2-ounces goat cheese

Step 1
Preheat the oven to 350°F. Grease a baking pan or deep wide pie-pan with olive oil.  Chop the squash into ½ inch rounds.  Line the pan with a layer of squash rounds, throw the onions over and crown with half of the goat cheese.  Set down another layer, use the rest of the goat cheese and crown with green onions.  Pour the remaining olive oil, season with paprika and salt, and evenly distribute the breadcrumbs over the top.
squash casserole assemble
Step 2
Throw the squash in the oven and bake until the veggies soften and the top browns (approx 45 min).  Serve up on plates as a lunch or to compliment an ENTRÉE.
squash casserole bake

AddThis Social Bookmark Button


October 24, 2008

Flatbread pizza + wine = boom-chicka-wa-wa

This recipe has been an old stand that never fails to make panties drop.  It also works great for parties because it’s fast, simple, aesthetically pleasing, low in carbs, and makes you look like America’s Next Top Chef.  For some reason, this deceivingly simple dish gets me more props than a high school drama student.  You can throw almost any combination of cheeses, meats and veggies to make your own masterpiece, but below is a classic crowd pleaser.

1. 1 Lavash flatbread
2. 1 tablespoon of olive oil
3. 1 handful of spinach
4. 1 half a red pepper sliced thinly
5. ½ a chicken sausage link sliced thinly
6. 1 handful of mozzarella cheese
7. Thin slices of brie (1/4 of a triangle of brie)

Step 1
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Drizzle olive oil over the lavash and spread it around evenly.

Step 2
Place the veggies, meat and cheese over the lavash.  It’s best to do veggies first, meat second and cheese last to hold your ingredient down.  Like a pizza crust, make sure to leave some room around the edges so it’s easy to hold onto.

Step 3
Place pizza in the oven and bake for about ten minutes.  The goal is to have the lavash crust golden brown.

Step 4
Remove from oven and chop into 6-8 pieces.  One cut long ways and either two or three cuts short ways then serve with a bottle of wine. Go get em, tiger!

•    Fig jam, brie, thin pear slices, candied walnuts
•    Beets, goat cheese, artichoke hearts